In the last days I have tried to avoid what has been happening in the world. Mainly because my mind is already at capacity with knowing the crime that happens on a daily basis; awful crimes that nobody ever hears about because it isn’t “big enough” to make the news. Last night I was inundated with BREAKING NEWS…as I began to sit and watch, my eyes could not focus on anything but flashing lights and police everywhere with their weapons drawn. I grabbed the remote and turned it off. I sat still for a moment almost feeling guilty for not allowing myself to indulge in what was in front of me. I kissed my son goodnight and said a little prayer. Today I felt the need to know…no longer wanted to live in bliss, but desired to take a closer look at the tragedies that have been occurring. As I dove into articles, video footage and photos my eyes filled with tears…no longer naive, but eyes wide open to this recent tragedy. Anxiety started to creep in as my mind began to focus on the aftermath. The aftermath of a tragedy are the moments that most people do not reflect on…but those are the moments that my mind refuses to shake. The tragedy in itself creates enough emotional exhaustion that when it’s over we tend to force ourselves back into normalcy. For the men and women in blue, this has turned into a manhunt. A fearful moment for all of us that have loved ones in law enforcement. Yes, they are trained to do this, but that doesn’t make them bulletproof. More lives can be lost, more damage can be done…I hope and pray it’s him and not one of ours.
My heart and prayers go out to the family of Officer Sean Collier.
“Lord I ask for courage, Courage to face and conquer my own fears…Courage to take me where others will not go…I ask for strength, Strength of body to protect others and strength of spirit to lead others…I ask for dedication, Dedication to my job, to do it well. Dedication to my community, to keep it safe…Give me Lord, concern for others who trust me and compassion for those who need me…And please Lord…Through it all…Be by my side.”